A research paper presented at the American Psychological Association’s annual conference found that texting can either increase intimacy between couples or create distance, and that the method of texting is more important than the frequency of texting. (1) Therefore, using creative and appropriate conversation starters in your text messages can help you start deeper, more meaningful conversations and significantly improve your relationships with others.
In this context, California blogger Ben Castillo recounts his experience starting a conversation on a dating site. He understood that simply saying “hello” or “hi” would not show interest in the other person. He said, “One conversation started with a quote I had on Tinder and it was a good one. Then he asked me about my star sign, we talked about marriage and ended with him asking me what kind of man I would be if I were his husband.”
The other conversation I had went really well, he added. We talked about hobbies, favorite foods and everything seemed perfect. Then we have a deeper conversation, we talk about aspirations and future goals. Not about marriage, but about the future…(i).”
The right message can make all the difference in building a meaningful connection, so we present you with text message conversation starters categorized as friendly, flirty, and funny to help you start a conversation based on your relationship with someone.
Friendly Text Message Conversation Starters
Whether you’re chatting with a friend, a crush, or a new acquaintance, these friendly text conversation starters will help you get to know the other person better, start meaningful discussions, and strengthen your relationship.
What food can’t you live without?
Is there anything you’re wondering about?
What was your last trip?
I’m currently watching show XYZ. Have you seen it?
What’s the last thing that made you feel embarrassed?
ABC Restaurant serves the best pizza in town. Would you like to go there with me?
Have you ever done something just to fit in with a group?
Are you reading any books right now?
What movie do you never get tired of watching?
What do you usually do when you feel down?
What’s your favourite place in the city?
Do you love hiking beautiful trails or relaxing on the beach?
Have you ever tried extreme sports?
Which emoji do you use most?
What is your favorite pizza topping?
Want to see the best views of the city? Let us take you there.
Are you adventurous or cautious?
Which movies do you think are overrated?
Image: Shutterstock
How would you describe your day so far?
What’s your favorite coffee shop in town?
What TV show do you secretly enjoy?
Are there any celebrities who inspire you?
Hey, do you like listening to the band XYZ? I have two tickets to their concert.
What do you want to learn?
If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Have you ever slept under the stars?
What do you dislike about your partner?
What quality do you find most attractive in a future spouse?
Have you ever flirted with someone?
What song have you been listening to over and over lately?
Have you ever been on a road trip?
What do you like to do in your spare time?
What is your dream job that you would do for free?
Do you have any strange fears?
What kind of movies do you not like to watch?
Have you ever done karaoke?
Image: Shutterstock
What do you like most about yourself?
38. What do you think is the most important rule of dating?
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever done to impress someone?
What is your most valuable asset?
What was the most interesting thing that happened today?
Which movie, TV show, or book character inspires you the most?
Which movie do you think is the worst?
What are the three most important things on your to-do list?
What is your favorite food?
Do you watch animated movies and TV shows?
During the pandemic, what have you come to appreciate more than anything you previously took for granted?
Want to give up coffee and alcohol for life?
If you could be a celebrity for a day, who would you choose and why?
Have you ever had a magical experience?
Did you know?
The average person spends about 23 hours a week texting, so having some great conversation starters at the ready can help.
What is your best memory from high school?
If you had a spirit, what would you wish for?
Are you a dog person or a cat person?
Do you have any tattoos?
Have you ever received a strange phone call?
Do you watch horror movies?
Have you seen any new movies on Netflix recently? We’d love your suggestions.
Is there someone you can talk to for hours?
What’s the most dangerous thing you’ve ever done?
What is the most valuable lesson you have learned in life?
If you won a million dollars, what would you do with it?
What’s the best pick up line you’ve ever said?
If you could start a nonprofit, what cause would you support?
Have you ever seen a sunrise or a sunset?
What do you love most about your best friend?
Have you ever broken the law?
What’s the nicest thing someone has done for you?
What is your most fond childhood memory?
Do you have any unusual food combinations that you like?
What do you think your perfect Saturday night would look like?
What do you think about the first date?
Do you like being outdoors or staying at home?
What is not acceptable in a relationship?
When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
What ice cream flavour do you wish didn’t exist?
If you could invent anything, what would it be?
What’s the strangest thing that’s happened to you?
If you had the chance to settle anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Whose advice do you value most?
Have you ever been on a strange date?
Describe yourself in three words.
What do you do best?
What are you most afraid of?
What is your favorite restaurant?
What question would you like to ask a celebrity?
How many countries have you visited so far?
What is the most spontaneous thing you have ever done?
What was the best road trip you’ve ever been on?
Funny Text Message Conversation Starters
If the conversation gets too serious, sending a humorous message can lighten the mood.
Here are some funny text conversation starters that will bring a smile to your special someone’s face.
How long can you survive in a haunted house?
If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do?
If you could be trapped in the world of anime for a day, which anime show would you want to be in?
Image: Shutterstock
If you could time travel, what year would you go to?
Have you ever followed someone on social media?
What is the stupidest mistake you have ever made?
What’s the weirdest question a date has ever asked you?
What’s the craziest advice you’ve ever received?
What’s the stupidest thing a date has done to you?
What’s the worst prank someone has ever played on you?
Would you rather have a botched forearm tattoo for the rest of your life or have blue hair for a week?
What’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to you in public?
Quick Tips
Before using a funny conversation starter, consider the other person’s sense of humor and your relationship with them to make sure the joke will be effective.
What if you woke up one day and found yourself as Donald Trump?
What comedy made you laugh so hard you cried?
What’s the craziest thing you’ve done while drunk?
What’s the strangest food you’ve ever eaten?
Do you believe in conspiracy theories? What are those theories?
What’s the dumbest joke you’ve ever heard that made you laugh?
If you were offered $1 million to broadcast an embarrassing private moment on national television, would you do it?
If you could be an inanimate object for a day, what would you be and why?
What’s the worst lie you’ve ever told about being home late?
Image: Shutterstock
If your pet could talk, what would be the first thing you would tell them?
If a movie were made about your life, what would the title of the movie be?
If you were a pet, which celebrity would you want as your owner?
Which celebrity would you like to date?
Have you ever farted in public and called someone out on it?
What is your funniest memory from childhood?
Do you have a favorite dad joke?
What is the strangest dream you have ever had?
What is your favorite meme?
What songs do you usually listen to at karaoke?
What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you in public?
If you could swap lives with any fictional character for a day, who would you choose?
What’s the strangest advice you’ve ever received?
What’s your favorite “knock, knock” joke?
What’s the funniest typo or autocorrect error you’ve ever sent over text?
What do you think are the worst pick up lines?
What’s the weirdest food in your fridge?
What’s the funniest thing your pet has ever done?
What is your strangest hidden talent?
What food best describes your personality?
What’s the funniest joke you’ve ever heard?
What is the funniest word in English?
Share the funniest photos you have on your phone.
Describe us with just emojis.
What animal do I resemble?
What embarrassing song do you secretly love listening to?
What’s the most interesting thing you’ve tried so far?
What’s the worst gift you’ve ever received?
What is your favorite dance?
What’s the funniest Wi-Fi network name you’ve ever seen?
What’s the funniest excuse you’ve ever come up with to get out of a plan?
What are your go-to songs to listen to when traveling long distances?
If you weren’t sleeping, how would you spend your free time?
Start a fun conversation over text
Want to spark a conversation? Use these engaging conversation starters.
I know I should wait three days to text after the first date, but waiting that long to talk to someone as amazing as you seems impossible.
I’ll make a delicious lasagna. Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?
Do you know what name I saved your number under in my phone?
Could you please stop looking so good in every photo? It’s getting in the way of my work.
I am bilingual, but every time I see you, I can only manage to say “ahh.”
I’m in a difficult situation. I can’t help but dream about you.
What’s the coolest person in the universe doing this weekend?
Thank you. I was feeling pretty down this morning but just thinking about you makes me smile.
Did you smile when you received this message? Now you know how I feel every time my phone rings with a text message from you.
Can you send me a picture? I told my friends I saw an angel but they didn’t believe me.
I’m really bad at love, can you give me some advice?
Want to know what my favorite things are?
Is there anything you regret in your life? I only have one regret: that I didn’t meet someone as wonderful as you sooner in my life.
When will I be able to see your bright smile again?
Want to know a secret? I used to think that celebrity X was the hottest person in the world. You made me realize how wrong I was.
How many flirty text messages do I have to send before he agrees to date me again?
What’s the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you? I’d like to get it done by the weekend. Want to join?
My friends think perfection is an illusion. Would you like to meet them and prove them wrong?
If you are wondering where to have dinner, I can give you some ideas and be your great travel companion.
Have you seen butterflies? Every time I see you I see them.
What would you say if I told you I was crazy about you?
Has someone ever told you that your smile lights up a room?
You know what’s going to be the highlight of my day? Dinner with friends. Are you ready?
Out of 8 billion people in the world, you are the only one who can make my heart beat faster. How can you do that so easily?
I have never stammered in front of anyone. But you are an exception. What do you think we should do about this?
I’ve often imagined watching the sunset with you. Would it be alright if I came over tonight?
Where have you been all this time? I’ve been waiting for you.
You look great today. What’s your secret?
I can’t help but smile when I think back to the last time we met. We had such a great time.
I have to admit, talking to you makes my heart beat faster. Is that your secret superpower?
I’m curious, what do you think your perfect date would be?
If you could run away anywhere right now, where would you go?
Let’s play a game called “What do you want?” First, why don’t you go on a spontaneous road trip or picnic with me?
You have a great sense of humor, it’s so sexy and I love it.
I have to admit, talking to you makes my day.
There’s something about you that makes me feel really special.
I enjoyed our conversation. Would you like to have a coffee with me?
Your name is Google, because you are everything I am looking for.
We realized we have a lot in common. Do you believe in love at first sight?
If you could spend the whole day together, what would you do?
I’m really happy to meet you, but I want to ask, are you looking for a serious relationship or just a casual one?
Your smile is contagious and makes me want to smile too.
I love your eyes, they’re like two chocolate lakes.
You’re so funny I could listen to you all day.
I can’t concentrate when he messes with me. I wonder what it would be like to meet him in real life.
I don’t know what is more attractive, your eyes or your smile.
If I had a super power, I would want the ability to teleport so I could be where you are whenever you want.
I’m not sure what’s more appealing to me: your intellect or your sense of humor.
I’m beginning to believe that you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever met.
If your life were a romantic movie, which one would you choose?
When you talk about me to your friends, what are my “their” pictures?
People ask me what my favorite way to start my day is to wake up to a text message from you.
Can I tell you a secret? Talking to you is the best part of my day.
My dog/cat told me to tell them I miss you.
You know what’s better than texting? Dating.
You must be a magician, I am mesmerized every time I see your photos.
What are your plans for this weekend? Can you join this plan?
Do you have plans for today? I know a cute coffee shop. Do you want to come with me?
What’s your favorite ice cream flavor? Let’s go get some ice cream, I’ll treat you.
Practical tips for using conversation starters
If you want to have a meaningful conversation, effective conversation starters can make all the difference. Here are some tips to break the ice and make your text conversation flow:
Pick the right time: Make sure the other person is free and in the mood to talk.
Go with the flow. Pay attention to how others respond and adjust your approach if necessary.
Be yourself: Use conversation starters that reflect your true self to create an atmosphere of openness and comfort.
Follow up: After you use a conversation starter, ask a follow up question to show interest and keep the conversation going.
Follow these simple yet effective tips to turn casual conversations into memorable text exchanges.
Illustration: Interesting conversation starters for texting
Image: Stable Diffusion Design Team/MomJunction
FAQ
1. How does texting affect conversation?
Texting can sometimes lead to misunderstandings about your feelings. In a texting conversation, you lose the ability to read the other person’s facial expressions, body language, and gestures. It can be difficult to grasp the intonation and tone of a text. However, it also saves time as responses are instantaneous.
2. Does texting improve social skills?
Texting can help improve social skills like communication and boost self-confidence for shy and quiet people. It’s also a great way to open up, chat at your own pace, make friends and start new relationships. Learning how to carry on a conversation over text will improve the quality and durability of these digital interactions.
3. What can I say instead of “hello” in a text message?
Hello, Hello, Hi, Hi there, Good morning/Good afternoon/Good evening, How are you?There are several greetings you can use instead of “hello” in a text message. Greetings vary depending on the situation and your relationship with the person.
4. What message should I send to a guy who is ignoring me?
If a guy ignores you, you should handle the situation with understanding and respect. Consider that he may have a valid reason for not replying right away, such as being busy or having personal issues. Some messages you can leave to let him know that you are waiting for his response include, “You haven’t replied to my message. Are you okay?” ” Hello. It’s been a while. If there’s anything on your mind, please let me know.”
5. How do I start a conversation over text with someone I don’t know that well?
It can be awkward to start a conversation over text with someone you don’t know that well, but with the right approach, you can make the conversation comfortable and engaging. Start with a friendly hello and choose the right time to send the text. Then, start with a brief introduction and look for common ground or shared interests to get the conversation going.
6. How should I respond if the person I’m texting sends me a short response?
It can be difficult to keep the conversation going when the person you’re texting gives you short replies. Ask open-ended questions that require detailed answers, and respond with follow-up questions or comments that show you’re actively listening. Show patience and understanding by sharing your own experiences related to the topic; this may encourage the other person to share more about their own experiences and thoughts.
7. How do I know when to end a text conversation?
Once a topic has been fully discussed and there are no more relevant points or questions to explore, you can end the conversation. If the other person’s replies are short, unenthusiastic, and take a long time to respond, this may indicate that they are losing interest and it may be appropriate to end the conversation.
When starting a conversation with someone you’re interested in, make sure you ask the right questions to keep the conversation going. Start with a polite hello and ask questions that are not intrusive and lead to fun conversation and wit. Questions can be conversation starters. But asking closed, awkward questions can lead to awkward one-line answers that ultimately end the conversation. With this list of good conversation topics for texting, you can ask the right questions to make a good first impression. If you haven’t talked to the person much, avoid topics that are overly personal and explicit. Instead, give them time to get used to you first.
Infographic: Texting conversation starters
Talking is the best way to understand each other better. But to keep the conversation flowing, you need some good conversation starters. In addition to our long list of conversation starters, we have added a few more in the infographic below so that you never run out of conversation starters. Read on and keep this list handy too.
Did you know?
Quick Tips
